THE BJORN DOW JONES INDEX

FUNNY THING

2006-08-31T11:30:00.000-07:00

I found this over on Sneakmove. Just goes to show that a good performance is all about having the right audience, eh.

THE WEEK IN METAL

2006-08-31T11:12:00.000-07:00

Last time it was Slayer's new album, this time it's the new Iron Maiden album, A Matter of Life & Death. It's almost too much for me, weak human that I am.

I'm not going to pretend hearing a new Iron Maiden album is easy, with excessive amounts of rose tinted nostalgia comes ridiculously high expectations ( see the Star Wars prequel trilogy for more on this) and I wasn't mad on The Reincarnation of Benjamin Breeg, which isn't to say I didn't like it, if you get me. So, having only listened through once, I think it's going to be a grower, which certainly isn't a first time experience with an Iron Maiden album, in fact Dance of Death was one of the few albums that got me early on, and we're still talking second or third listen here.

UPDATE - Just finished my second listen and, well, I think I love it, I've even identified my stage 1 favourite tracks, being These Colours Don't Run, get the tempo change on the chorus plus an woh-oh-woh bit, and The Longest Day, which weirdly enough has a cool tempo change chorus too, spooky, a really cool quietish beginning bit and ace guitar solos.

All in all it's, cue music journo cliche, totally Maiden - which if you want a fuller description of such sentiments kind've feels like the bits in Lord of the Rings when things go right for the heroes, but without the over emotional facial expressions.

WHAT NEXT?

2006-08-30T14:14:00.000-07:00

Every so often i just get bored of writing this thing, whether it's because stupid savefile won't let me upload any songs or I simply haven't got anything to write about (or, more usually the time to write it).

But another reason is that most of the time the stuff I write is little more than reportage and lists, with about three words of opinion, which is so wrong given that I consider myself fairly opinionated (not in an obnoxious way though, you understand)

So from now on, my posts are going to be a bit longer, maybe not as easy to read (not that they ever really are) and frothing with opinion, hopefully.

EXTREMES

2006-08-18T06:06:00.000-07:00

It doesn't get much better than a new Slayer album especially one with the original line up, yes the original line up!!! I want to see them live and Morbid Angel but who will go with me to these things??

Nobody, that's who. (Plus Morbid Angel played yesterday, so it's, well, impossible).

I remember seeing Morbid Angel at the LA2 back in blah blah blah.... but it was like Satan was actually helping out, especially on drums, Pete Sandoval is pretty damn close to Dave Lomardo's amazingness.

The main point of this post was to say that I was even more right about metal's comeback. Look the darlings of the indie-ish scene, Bonde Do Role, just rap over metal records in like a funny baby language (sorry speakers of Portugese, that was very patronising). But if I knew what she was saying it would be nowehere near as cool.

Even Julian Cope agrees and who's going to argue with him?

Oh yeah and Junior Boys are very good live, even if the Luminaire was rammed with liggers. I reckon I was the only person who paid to get in.

Slayer - Jihad (topical) and Catatonic (a slowy)
Morbid Angel - Lion's Den ( a classic)
Junior Boys - Count Souvenirs

THREE GIRLS

2006-08-07T03:34:00.000-07:00

Pottymouth was a much better experience than Club NME, even though I played only 3.5 songs, they were 3.5 very good songs so I'm happy.

Bonde do Role - Melo de Tabaca (Audioclit remix)
Young & Restless - Black
Galaxian!!! -
Siouxsie & the Banshees - Love in a Void

Despite a collection of weirdos who'd have put the Star Wars cantina scene patrons to shame, (including one off-her face girl who decided to go topless and bite the rear of one of the performers while everyone did their best to ignore her. Silly Cow.) it was all really rather wholesome given that the Spread Eagle is an astounding dive.

The bands were all pretty damn cool, first up was Starvation Box - a kind've Courtney Love-esque garage-y thing, with an inverted White Stripes pretension (ie. boy drummer, girl guitarist/ singer). Check out Dead Today with it's Wendy O Williams-like snarlings.

Second up was Mary Luxemburg and the Black Bats whose super-distorted guitar sound I was loving. And bless 'em they even gave me a shout out for playing Love in a Void. If only there were more people like that, sigh. Listen to Blonde Red.

And finally winning the coveted weird-as-hell-but-funny-and-catchy award was Naomi, whose myspace pictures would suggest a predilection for exhibitionism, but who managed to keep her clothes on for the performance, despite popular opnion too much nudity is a bad thing. Just a girl and her laptop making bleepy pop sings was good enough to persuade me to buy two CDs off her.Here's a song off one of them - Rien Que Ca.

SLIGHTLY OBSCURE ITALO DISCO

2006-08-05T12:46:00.000-07:00

Super Radio are my new friend on Myspace, don't know much about them. I think they're a label and they have some fricking amazing Italo Disco acts on there, the most well-known to me being Camaro's Gang, who I believe were on I-F's Mixed Up In The Hague vol 1 (they were the days, sigh).

Their website is pretty cheapo looking, but they make up for it with the soft focus images from the 80s heyday of ID (see pic).

Anyway, I love Italo Disco, I'd forgotten all about it, well apart from like Zombi who are quite Italo.

Here's some for listening pleasure.

RAF - Self Control
Check Up Twins - Sexy Teacher
Lectric Workers - Robot is Systematic
Camaro's Gang - Bronx

IF YOU THOUGHT THE MAG WAS BAD....

2006-08-05T12:39:00.000-07:00

Club NME was the usual shambolic affair.

Speakers sounded crap, didn't get paid enough, too few drinks tokens. Their turnover of DJs must be higher than for McDonald's staff.

I played:

Freakplasma - Punk It
Bonde Do Role - Melo do Tobaco (Radioclit remix)
BYOP - We Will Vacation, You Will Be My Parasol
Joan Jett - Bad Reputation
Young & Restless - Black
Prototypes - Tir Aux Pigeons
Debbie Harry - I Want That Man
Dolly Parton - Burning
Fleetwood Mac - Little Lies
Pat Benatar - Heartbreaker
Heart - Barracuda
GnR - You Could Be Mine

But no-one got into it, harumph.

Can't be bothered putting any songs up...

oh okay have Bonde do Role - Danca da Ventuinha (I'm well getting into them now)

DEAD DISCO

2006-08-05T12:25:00.000-07:00

Speaking of quality female musicians, Dead Disco totally stole the show at Club Fandango - a kindof weird collection of suburban indie kids - last Tuesday. I can't remember the names of the other bands playing - says it all really. Even though they are without doubt the tiniest band ever seen (yes, smaller than The Like) I'll go for quality over quantity any day.

I have this theory that because there are fewer female musicians/bands that it's easier for girl bands to sound original simply because there are fewer precedents to be influenced by. With guy bands it always sounds like they're trying to be 'The Beach Boys' or 'The Clash' or whoever and it just sounds totally lame. Especially when they try and rip off the vocal style or add in some really inappropriate harmony to their generic indie bilge.

DD just don't sound like anything else at the moment, or possibly ever, and believe it or not they write GOOD SONGS rather than wasting their energy on trying to be the new (insert influential band name here).

And they were really friendly and chatty (see picture) and even did an interview for Pamflet (the best fanzine in the world, ask Vogue) which may or may not have recorded.

The City

NO SWEETS

2006-08-05T09:58:00.000-07:00

Aw, last week the NFT's Access All Areas season came to an end and I saw far fewer films than I wanted to which isn't a major surprise, I only see about two things at the cinema a year just because going there takes up so goddam much of the evening and is way too expensive(I do LOVE the pick n mix sweets though, even if the film's are often a bit shit). Mainly I missed Some Kind've Monster.

Sadly the NFT doesn't do sweets, I think you can actually get booted out for eating them during a screening (yeah, they're called 'screenings' in the NFT). So it was a good job the recordings of live performances from Kate Bush and Siouxsie and the Bansees were really fricking good, so good that I wanted to become a goth for a day or two afterwards.

On top of some of the best music ever, it was so good to see a couple of complete weirdos doing their stuff with absolute confidence. Kate Bush was easily the weirdest of the two, her mime/contemporary dance show getting a lot of inappropriate laughs from the mentally retarded 50 somethings who made up most of the audience. Alot of said 50 somethings also left at the beginning of and more annoyingly, during the Siouxsie and the Banshees stuff. I called them 'squares' in quite a loud voice.

Here's Wow off Lionheart by Kate Bush because, well, it says it all.

And howabout Israel off Once Upon a Time: the singles by Siouxsie and the Bs, because that's the song they opened with, and you know it's kind've topical and all.

Lord Bruce

2006-07-25T03:55:00.000-07:00

Just look at this !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It goes without saying that Bruce is so the coolest rock star ever that Elvis should be stripped of his erstwhile title and Bruce crowned 'THE KING' from this day forward.

Long live Bruce, long live Bruce etc.

Listen to Powerslave, the most appropriate song I could find, you know Pharoahs were like Egyptian kings, yeah.

LOVELIFE setlist: 24th July

2006-07-25T03:00:00.000-07:00

Yeah, go boyfriend-girlfriend teams of djs, we showed the 20 or so people who turned up at 93 Feet East who's boss (once we actually had electricity).

I did 3 sets this time:

Number 1
Giorgio Moroder -
Junior Boys - Count Souvenirs
The Grates - Sukkafish
Love is All - Make Out
Freakplasma - Punk It
Erase Errata - Tax Dollar
Prototypes - Who's Gonna Sing
Ms John Soda - Scan the Ways
Debbie Harry - In Love With Love

Number 2
Suzi Quatro - I Wanna Be Your Man
The Violets - Hiero
X - Los Angeles
Tigs - BRC
The Long Blondes - Fulwood Babylon
The Sounds - Painted By Numbers
OMD - Electricity
Paula - Als Es Passierte
Animotion - I Engineer (remix)
Crazy Gang - Telephone Computer
Wang Chung - Fire in the Twilight
The Gossip - Listen Up (MSTRKRFT remix)
Boytronic - Bryllyant
New Young Pony Club - Get Dancey
Holy Hail - Born of a Star
Dangerous Dan vs Van She - Around the World in 5.07 (Again)

And Part 3
Alexander Robotnick - The Dark Side of the Spoon (original version)
Bondage Fairies - Faze
Sleater Kinney - Oh
Young & Restless - Dirty Kicks
Bondo do Role - Melo do Tabaca (Radioclit remix)
Duchess Says - Black Flag
Uffie - Hot Chick
Does it Offend You - We Are Rockstars
Peaches - Downtown (Simiam Mobile Disco remix)
Peaches - Do Ya
CSS - Lets Make Love and Listen to DFA (Spank Rock remix)
YYYs - Cheated Hearts (Peaches remix)
Prototypes - Tir Aux Pigeons

Prototypes are my new favourite band for this week and this week only. I somehow managed to miss their album last year (maybe that's because it wasn't released over here 'til this year). What's going on with French music, that must be, like, 4 good bands of Gallic descent I've counted now. My favourite tracks from the album are Tir Aux Pigeons and who's Gonna Sing.

I also quite like The Grates' new album, they've decided to be a bit more tuneful than their EPs, which makes listening to a whole album of it a whole lot easier. Sukkafish is so weird it's cool, with it's bluegrass verses and commercial rock chorus bit. (While I'm at it, what's with all the good Australian music?!)

Which isn't to say I don't like a bit of noise, as you well know, courtesy of Mika Miko this time round who manage to do a very convincing 'Le Tigre band practice circa 1997' with The Dress.

Honorable mention goes out to Pardom My Freedom for scoring 2 new Uffie tracks - Hot Chick being my preference on this occasion. She's a funny little thing isn't she.

The Decline of Western Civilization

2006-07-21T02:23:00.000-07:00

You know that metal phase? It got a whole lot worse last night when I saw The Decline of Western Civilization Part 2: The Metal Years at the NFT (whose Access All Areas season literally rocked). I own it on VHS but it was so much cooler seeing it big.

Clearly the coolest thing about it is Megadeth's 'no poseur bollocks' rendition of In My Darkest Hour, oh yeah, and the bit were Ozzy tries to pour some orange juice into a glass and misses (even though it was really added in post production)

RETURN OF THE METAL HORDES

2006-07-09T13:55:00.000-07:00

Every so often I just lapse back into metal, I don't mean to it just happens, like returning to the womb, minus the warmth, comfort and safety etc. Resistance is by and large futile.

To be fair I'm not just listening to any old metal here, Great White this is not - we're talking Finnish mytho-folk metallers Amorphis, who blew me away with their 2nd and 3rd albums back in the 90s and who return to fiddle-dee-dee form with their latest release Eclipse. The singer occasionally goes a little bit Nickleback (urgh) but by and large this is equal parts epic, dark and earthy. Check Brother Moon

DarkThrone give us the good old old skool biscuit barrel style and manage to produce the catchiest black metal album since Under the Sign of the Black Mark, The Cult is Alive, indeed it is. Check Shut Up AND The Cult of Goliath

You would be right to say 'what the hell have The Gathering got to do with metal hordes?' and you'd be right, but they used to be metal (remember that?) so they're staying here, plus every female fronted symphonic-goth-orchestral-medieval dress-wearing female fronted band has ripped Anneke van Giersbergen's vocal style off ever since. The new album, Home, is pretty melancholic, but in a nice light way that doesn't make you want to kill yourself, just weep into your pillow 'til sunrise. Check In Between

Finally those lords of Viking Metal, you guessed it Enslaved have come back with yet another classic premium cut of epic-prog-black-edda-inspired metal with Ruun. Perhaps not for Sunday afternoon lisening with your girlfriend, but a killer all the same. Check Fusion of Sense and Earth

Also check out Ian Miller - easily the best artist ever at doing evil twisted stuff. Warhammer 4 eva.

Noisey: Duchess Says & We Are Wolves

2006-07-08T10:01:00.000-07:00

Why do some bands sound so totally different live to their recordings??

I figured Duchess Says were a sort of electro/new wave band with only a touch of the disharmonic about them, but heck no, live they are fricking well hard, semi death grunt/hardcore shouting eye-rolling frontwoman, massively distorted weird keyboard noises, in the context of truly sweaty boho dive and shite PA system - the keyboardist didn't really need to wear the Crass t-shirt to get the message across, Duchess Says want to be punks, hardcore, LA late 70s style. And they do it so good.

Black Flag is definitely my favourite track of theirs.

Only caught a few of We Are Wolves songs. They were a little less noisey, or maybe my ears had just got used to the sound, would have liked to have hung around for me, but bed was calling my name and I couldn't stomach any more pissy white wine. T.R.O.U.B.L.E starts off sort of Neu!ish then goes a bit sort of Suicide-ish.

Oh, the irony

2006-07-05T05:32:00.000-07:00

And I thought no-one read this.

Apparently the guys at Barden's Boudoir do and they kindly quoted my damning review of Cleckhuddersfax (I'm quoated on their Myspace page to, although I'm not 100% on the 'indie kid' tag) in their weekley mail out (and on their website too), but - and get this - they used it to PROMOTE the band!!!!!!! Why, those pesky little so and sos...

...and the buggers didn't even have the manners to put up a link.

Lovelife 3rd July 06

2006-07-05T05:30:00.000-07:00

It was so hot, but thanks to the big fan behind the dj bit it was actually a lovely experience.

Managed to catch two Shimura Curves songs in the main room, before being dragged back to music duties, they were as splendid as ever.

my set sounded like this...

Number 1
The Left Outsides - Losing Touch Withe My Mind
Kirk deGeorgio presents Esoterik - Starwaves
The Dominatrix - The Dominatrix Sleeps Tonight
Lorena C - Rock Your Body
Temposhark ft Imogen Heap - Not That Big (Metronomy remix)
2raumwhong - Ich und Elaine
Sally Shapiro - I'll be by Your Side
Peaches - Do it Hard
Young & Restless - Dirty Kick
Schwervon - Swamp Thing
X - Nausea
Tigs - Something New
Fuzzbox - Self
The Long Blondes - Weekend Without Makeup
Stevie Nicks - I Can't Wait
Eagle & Talon - Dropped Down
Siouxsie & the Banshees - Love in a Void
Starlet Suicide - Try to Break Me
Sleater Kinney - You're No Rock n Roll Fun
Kait0 - Catnap

Number 2
Glass Candy - Etheric Device
Bizarre Music Machine - BMM
Betty Botox - Xantac
Zeigeist - Tar Heart
YYYs - Gold Lion (Nick Zinner remix)
Snuten ft Fox n Wolf - Wild & Free
Galaxian!!! - Domingo
Bikini Kill - I Like Fucking
Young & Restless - Black
Be Your Own PET - We Will Vacation, You Can be My Parasol
The Sounds - Tony the Beat
Vivien Lee - Alright
Martika - I Feel the Earth Move
Cansie de ser Sexy - This Month Day 10
Paula - Als Es Passierte
Debbie Harry - I Want That Man

I love Eagle and Talon, they seem like a couple of down to earth girls despite being from LA, just, like, making some cool music - Dropped Down. Get the rest of their EP from their website.

I also love Tigs kind've reminds me of Blondie but a bit harder, sortof - BCR (get the album (7" and badge and patch) for just £6 by joining the fanclub).

And last but not least KaitO - Catnap - 3 years no album, what are you doing?? Ah, I see, they're in the middle of making it.

NEW GENRES: No ONE

2006-06-30T08:10:00.000-07:00

Introducing....

INDIECORE

'Core' is such an overused suffix when it comes to genre nomenclature, I'm not 100% sure what it means but given the precedents I'm willing to put my money on hard, noisey, fast and, as such, really fricking annoying - see GrindCORE, HardCORE, QueerCORE etc. etc.

So what the hell is indiecore?? Other than a stupid made up genre with an unoriginal name??

It's the antithesis of wet, whining, twee, simpering, limp-wristed, self-pitying indie.

I suppose a less pretentious man than I would simply say it's indie with punk attitude but how boring is that, I mean with so many blogs out there people just don't have time to read prosaic or long-winded music descriptions do they...

The Kings and Queens of INDIECORE =

Young & Restless = soon to be the most popular band ever from Australia, they are well harder than any other indie band. Black

Von Iva = why don't they hurry up and release some damn new material?? Maybe because one of them has gone off to have a baby, aw. Jillian Iva is harder than all The Killers put together. Showboat.

Channels 3 and 4 = utterly noisey, shouting and stuff, songs that are songs are really short Grindcore style. The Queen.

Be Your Own PET = even though NME love them, they actually deserve it because they play really fast and even do the odd guitar solo. We Will Vacation...

Todd = scary and noisy and fast, the grindiest so far. Hog Blood River

Mutators = I don't know if it was recorded in a bin or they just made it sound like it was recorded in a bin, suffice to say they're just fricking sick and have the best Myspace picture ever. Hmm, don't seem able to download any music off Myspace at the moment, you'll just have to listen to a song of there's on there.

AIDS Wolf = best ever source of stupid names: special deluxe, hiroshima thunder, barbarian destroyer, him, the maji and, er, mark mclean. We Multiply.

that's all for now, will keep you posted on the emerging dukes, earls, counts and squires of indiecore...

Out of touch

2006-05-30T13:58:00.000-07:00

Jeesus, fricking, Christ I haven't posted anything for ever (almost). So here's my...

....set list from last Tuesday's Pamflet IV launch party at Sketch....

I haven't got a clue what order I played this lot in.

the Left Outsides - Leaving the Frozen Butterflies Behind
Blondie - Sunday Girl (French version)
The Gossip - Standing in the Way of Control
The Sounds - Tony the Beat
The YYYs - Gold Lion
Young & Restless - Satan
Siouxsie & the Banshees - Christine
X - Nausea
The Long Blondes - Giddy Stratospheres
The Like - What I Mean and What I Say
The Runaways - Queens of Noise
Girlschool - Take it All Away
Danielle Dax - Cathouse
Pretty Vicious - Hollywood Forever
Lene Lovich - I Think We're Alone Now
The Would be Goods - Miss La Di Dah
Cansei de ser Sexy - Meeting Paris Hilton
Linda Ronstadt - Tumbling Dice
Bikini Kill - I Like Fucking
Peaches - Two Guys

....And my Club NME setlist from the Friday before last (with Peaches Geldof in support)

I can't remember the order again think it went something like this (I was quite drunk):

YYYs - Gold Lion
Siouxsie & the Banshees - Spellbound
Sabrina - Boys
Falco - Der Kommissar
Yazoo - Don't Go
Fox n Wolf - In Yr Underwear
Kim Wilde - Never Trust a Stranger
The Sounds - Tony the Beat
Motorhead (ft Wendy O Williams) - No Class
Cansie de ser Sexy - Meeting Paris Hilton
Lene Lovich - I Think We're Alone Now
Shannon Let the Music Play
Joan Jett - Bad Reputation
Au Pairs - Inconvenience
The Long Blondes - Seperated by Motorways (Sexmatronic remix)
Iron Maiden - The Number of the Beast

and, um, some other songs maybe....

What I didn't play is this or maybe I did - Lorena C - Rock Your Body, kind've like Yelle a bit, but a little more Euro-cheese (that's a positive by the way).

Couple of Peaches tracks on Pardon My Freedom, veeerrry good. This one is really great too - Boys Wanna be Her. In fact the whole damn album is doing it for me.

And a MSTRKRFT song - She's Good For Business (not especially keen on the rest of the album, mind).

And just have to mention these guys Young & Restless, that have been mentioned on loads of blogs, but are worth mentioning again because they are kicking ass.

LoveLife Set list 8th May 2006

2006-05-09T02:47:00.000-07:00

Set 1
Glass Candy - Life Before Sunset
Thomas Dolby - The Wreck of the Fairchild
The Hot Springs - Cacodisco
Mynx - I'm so LA
RAF - Self Control
B52s - Mesopotamia
Stereolab - Visionary Road Maps
The Organ - Memorize the City
Zombi - Sapphire
Junior Boys - Like a Child
Barbara Morgenstern - The Operator
Ladyfuzz - Monster
The Charades - Who Wanna Dance Now
The Fallout Trust - Before the Light Goes Out (Simian remix)
The Dresden Dolls - Sex Changes
YYYs - De Ja Vu
The Rogers Sisters - Never Learn to Cry
Caged Baby - Hello There (Presets mix)
Jenny Wilson - Let My Shoes Lead me Forward (The Knife remix)
Debbie Harry - Dirty & Deep

Set 2
Vicarious Bliss - Theme from Vicarious Bliss (Justice mix)
ARE Weapons - Keys, Money, Cigarettes
Whitey - Wrap it Up
Dsico - I've Danced Enough
Cat5 - Stretch & Bend
Christopher & Raphael Just - Popper (feat. Fox n Wolf)
Mystery Jets - The Boy who Ran Away (Riton rerub)
Ms John Soda - No One
Sexual Harassment - Exercise Your Ass Off
Fox n Wolf - In Yr Underwear
Falco - Der Kommissar
Kylie Minogue - Come into my World (Fischerspooner remix)
We Start Fires - Hot Metal
Yelle - Short Dick Cuizi
New Young Pony Club - Get Dancey
The Long Blondes - Sexmatronic
Transformer di Roboters - Hi End

I've got this issue with dance music songs being way too long and this SO proves it, I only managed to fit 18 songs into a set of over 65 minutes against my average of, well, loads more.

Anyway, I'm going to do something that I haven't done before and that I'm particularly bad at, that is..... link the blogs from whom I've downloaded so much of the music I've played - it seems only fair after all.

Now I can't promise I'm going to remember everybody's name, nor the songs I've downloaded, but heck, with Google blog search at my side I'm going to try my best.

So, 20 Jazz Funk Greats is easily one of the greatest blogs alive (just check my set list if you're reading guys) - they have given me Fox n Wolf - In Yr Underwear amongst many other greats, including Transformer di Roboter - Hi End, Zombi and lots more...

Big Stereo are also great, that's where I found Yelle - Short Dick Cuizi, and Debbie Harry's new one.

The Prettiest Pony have doled out copious amounts of MSTRKRFT (see past set lists) and gave me ARE Weapons - Keys, Money, Cigarettes this time round.

For all my girl-music needs I go to Buscate un Novio even though I don't know any Spanish.

The Junior Boys track came from Keep it Coming, thanks, they're ace.

On a completely different note, I love these two songs, even though they're, yes, the same song by different bands. Dark Throne do a, well, black metal version of Love in a Void by Sioxsie & the Banshees so if you like black metal you'll like it, the cool thing is that the original version of Love in a Void is an on-the-cheap punk song that doesn't sound too different anyway.

And my favourite new song that I got off a blog is Glitterbeat - Stand Up (but I can't remember which blog I found it on)

Buy Dark Throne - Too Old, Too Cold
Buy Siouxsie & the Banshees - Once Upon a Time: the singles

Hipster Bashing

2006-05-04T06:15:00.000-07:00

This is from one of the coolest articles (or collection of articles, there are parts 1, 2, 4 & 5 too) I have ever read, way better than crap like the Hipster Handbook (seriously, I've never heard anyone say 'deck', ever) - this is my favourite bit -

"..hipsters make no pretense to divisions on principle, to forming
intellectual or artistic camps; at any given moment it is the same books,
records, films that are judged au courant by all, leading to the curious
spectacle of an "alternative" culture more unanimous than the mainstream it
ostensibly opposes."
It's like the symbols of hipster-ness (bands, books, films, clothes, places to hang out) = exclusivity, but exclusivity outside of group consensus just = being a 'freak'. The contradiction inherent within hipsterness would then be that they are afraid of becoming the very thing they outwardly aspire to be, hmm.

I don't actually have a problem with the existence of hipsters/trendies or whatever, they add some much needed colour to the urban fauna of our cities, but it's best when they're low in numbers. I don't know whether to blame the internet, Top Shop or Kate Moss, but the numbers have increased dramatically over the past year and are now reaching critical mass, where every suburban middle class kid is sporting emo hair, skinny jeans and a vintage dress (the latter is mainly just girls). None of these faux-indie kids sport the geeky/saddo nature of the indie kids of years gone by, they're just horrible little slags and braying lads dressed in the soft woolen skin of indie-dom.

Anyway, hipsters seem to be getting it at the moment what with this and this and this (although that last one isn't anywhere near as funny as the first two. Who the hell is Charles Bukowski? Oh wait, I'm on the internet, I know who he is now) and it's about damn time.

So, onto the music, hmmm, not sure what to post. My Last FM chart isn't looking too bad this week, so how about Cat5 - Stretch & Bend, a song I haven't seen on a single other blog which makes a change. And Ms John Soda - No One a song I've seen on many blogs, but I'm sure another won't hurt and finally to keep the geek contingent happy Megadeth - Holy Wars... the Punishment Due (this IS their best song ever).

Buy Cat5 - Stretch & Bend (it took me fricking ages to track this one down)

Buy Ms John Soda - Notes and the Like

Buy Megadeth - Rust in Peace

Postscript: yes, I did go to a Flash Mob, but only once. I'm not a hipster, honest, I hate Clap Your Hands Say Yeah, and if they're not cool anymore, well that just proves my point.

GLAM!

2006-04-28T02:11:00.000-07:00

Boredom at work can result in many activities, most of which involve the internet in some way - by far the easiest to fall into and undoubtedly the least rewarding is to randomly click your way through the profiles of strangers' 'friends' on Myspace.

On this occasion however I uncovered a whole cross atlantic 'glam metal' (not 'hair metal', that term was invented by a journalist who wrote for The Face in 2001. No wait, according to Wikipedia it was in fact invented by MTV in the 90s. Whatever.) scene, that seems to have its dual centres in Hollywood and Stockholm, pretty weird. I also have reports from the ground that the same thing is happening in LA. I want to go.

This guy sums it up pretty well, as does his friend Marky de Sade. It would be too easy to put the boot in and slag them off but being intrepid and open-minded I listened to some of their stuff and, oh shit, I even liked some of it. Especially these - Starlet Suicide - Try to Break Me. They kind of sound like The Sounds mixed with The Runaways but with some metal style twiddly bits (not The Killers), but words are as nothing to the sound. These ones have actually captured the most authentic glam metal sound I've heard so far, which they should be both proud and ashamed of. Problem with most of these bands is that they want to do a GnR and mix sleazy hard rock with punk so most of them end up sounding like Green Day (yuck). Think these guys have kind've nailed it (Twisted Sister?) but their sound is so bad it's hard to tell

I think there is actually a small scene in the UK (well, 2 bands anyway) one of whom I saw in Camden about 2 years ago, but I can't remember their name. Something about prostitutes.

Here's Metal Rules Top 50 Glam Metal bands of all time. Now they've put Love/Hate at no. 37. I personally believe it was a bit of a master piece, listen - Love /Hate - She's an Angel (for the 'mommy took the strings off your bass / so you don't hang yourself' line alone). I also preferred Slave to the Grind by Skid Row, not that that will mean much to anybody.

Buy Love/Hate - Blackout in the Red Room

Buy Skid Row - Slave to the Grind

Buy Starlet Suicide stuff

Indie KIDS

2006-04-18T05:33:00.000-07:00

Oh look Hanson have gone indie! No wait that's actually Panic! at the Disco

Normally I'd say I was getting old, but that isn't enough to explain how fresh faced these little critters look. Look at their little pink cheeks and fluffy hair. Aw, and they've got a big orange ball, I bet 'catch' is their favourite game.

Thursday's 'Adventures in the Beetroot Field' at Fabric (yes even Fabric want a piece of the indie pie) merely confirmed my suspicions that indie-style nursery rhymes are just round the corner.

It was rampant with the under age who got under foot, overexcited and on my nerves, throwing up after one too many (actually just make that one) vodka and cokes. I actually envy them that bit because beer cost £3.90 a tiny bottle and spirit and mixer over £4. Frick. It reminded me why I hate Fabric.

Indie has always had a rather large fey side, but even when kids were doing it they were slightly shabby looking not pre-pubescent public school boys (I blame Busted/McFly etc.)

At this stage I'd say thank the lord for indie girls showing the boys how to do it properly, but my water tight argument sprung a leak after hearing The Organ (memorise the city). They sound like the girl version of Coldplay/Keane/Coldplay/wet indie band etc. Actually that's really harsh, they're not that bad, in fact they have the jangly 80s indie sound down pretty good.

Anyway here's some grumpy / noisey / grubby girl indie. First The Vibration - The Violets - Hiero who promise lots of new MP3s on their website. And finally The Demolition Doll Rods -

A Quiet Week

2006-04-10T06:39:00.000-07:00

I don't really have much to say, but feel compelled to write something because of this things (my blog) existence.

The reality is that some weeks music is really important, other weeks it seems to be less so and while admittedly this blog purports to do more than talk about just music , in reality that is what the subject usually is.

So, although no-one can see from the position of this post (I really have to sort out the stupid columns so the one on the right isn't squashed underneath the middle one) I have my Last FM weekly chart on display for all the world, or rather potentially all the world to see. Which could make null and void my weekly 'Top of My Pops' post. On second thoughts, I think I'll carry on doing them anyway, mainly because I want to. Guess I better get to work on it.

Other Things: Saw some god awful band called CLECKHUDDERSFAX at Bardens Boudoir re-opening night. Both the opening and the band were shambolic in every way, which I think the organisers actually encourage in a vain attempt to appear anarchic and well, 'Dalston'. Most of their set sounded like Black Dice's out takes (look, Black Dice have no fans and weirdly, or perhaps not so weirdly, no friends) and their singer was rude to my friend and had the cheek to do it while wearing a stupid orange vest thing.
BJDI Rating = SHIT

Good Other Things:On Sunday night we saw Shimura Curves at somebody's, er, unit next to London Fields. They were much, much better than Cleckhuddersafax and weren't rude to anyone. In fact they were pretty damn brave to do a gig in someones living room eyeball to eyeball with their friends. In that context friends are way more intimidating than strangers.
BJDI Rating = REALLY GOOD

ONe More Thing: Another thing I did was put together a BJD demo, a process that consumed about 1000 times more of my week than I had planned for, partly because I'm an anal perfectionist and partly because my mouse pad is oversensitive. I haven't tried to find out what she really says, but the second line of Morningwood's 'Jetsetter' sounds just like 'I'm weeing in my cups'. I just checked, apparently she's saying 'I'm ennui and in my cups' which makes less sense, because ennui is a noun, right?

UPDATE: I've fixed my blog so it doesn't look so weird anymore

2006-03-30T06:37:00.000-08:00

I know it really isn't important to anybody else but I really have to post my weekly Last FM chart, just be thankful it's only the Top 5 and not the Top 20.

At number 1 this week are The Sounds, unsurprisingly. I'm a little bit bored of them right now though.

At number 2 are The Chalets, um because I like them and I only really took them in after I saw this PUNKCAST (scroll down a bit).

At number 3 it's Missing Persons, wooooo! Well I had to really didn't I what with all the The Sounds comparisons and whatnot.

At number 4 is well, Throwing Muses. I like 50 Foot Wave (free music!), see, and wanted to listen to some old Kristin Hersh.

At number 5 is The Pretenders a band I still can't get into despite numerous attempts to do so. Is there something wrong with me? (Admittedly it was a singles compilation and I am a bit of an album track person).

Right, play out is Missing Persons - Walking in LA.

dire things about media no.1: The Observer Music Monthly

2006-03-28T03:16:00.000-08:00

Life is a pain. It means I end up updating my blog with something I experienced almost a fortnight ago. And this isn't the first time, as any one who has read any post here has noticed the events I record tend to be posted sometime after the event.

Some particularly keen bloggers actually write their stuff as the event happens! I can't multi-task like that though...

So, yeah the Sunday after last's Observer Music Monthly was yet another work out in middle-aged befuddlement of the kind even Q or Mojo would shy away from. But this one outdid itself in the 'out-of-touch' stakes in just two sentences:

"Thanks to the success of the Arctic Monkeys, there's barely a soul who hasn't heard of MySpace. You'd be hard pushed, however, to find many over the age of 16 who actually know what it is"

WTF!? Anybody who has even heard of Myspace knows that there are quite literally millions of people over the age of 16 on Myspace, in fact for work I had to interview a bunch of 11 year olds and none of them had even heard of Myspace.

The remainder of the OMM's Top Five snippets of stupidity include:
2. An interview with Sh**ne W**d
3. An interview with Sh**ne W**d (sorry couldn't resist)
4. Putting James Bl**t at the top of the 'uppers' - I'll never tire of hating him and all he stands for.
5. Miranda Sawyer admitting to never having used her iPod - buy a fricking Zen moron, you don't need iTunes (actually, just buy a new computer).